After George was murdered by Blanche’s boyfriend, there was a funeral. Lady Smock thrived on funerals, and assumed the duties of death with brio. Others’ woes brought her to life and gave her hope. But this was tricky. She didn’t care one whit for Great Uncle George. He besmirched the family reputation when he deflowered Blanche in the pantry.
Nonetheless, a funeral was necessary. She consulted her Excel spreadsheet of to do’s:
- Send condolence card (hard to find one for this particular circumstance – “So sorry for the loss of the your diddling husband.”)
- Request mass for the deceased. (She foresaw a major contribution to the parish.)
- Make boeuf bourguignon (She had a reputation to maintain.)
- Rally the neighbours to drop meals, make a schedule, and provide suggestions (she saw no reason to feed the bereaved vats of spaghetti sauce).
- Set up a Facebook remembrance page. (She couldn’t wait to read the posts!)
When Harry arrived with a bouquet of Sweet Peas to dress the funeral buffet, the last of her concerns about the funeral dissolved. Life was fun again.