The glasscutter call of a chickadee breaks
open the day with continuous song
while I gulp coffee and serious list-make.
I apply bullet points for brevity’s sake
dots that show how my day clips along.
The glasscutter call of a chickadee breaks…
Check-check, check-check, devoted I take
clock’s caution to hurry – you don’t have that long,
while I gulp coffee and serious list-make.
Her insistent refrain – so much is at stake
you must sing right now – something could go wrong.
The glasscutter call of a chickadee breaks…
calls and calls, calls again, my ancient heart aches
my pen receives nothing but she sings on strong
while I gulp coffee and serious list-make.
Time bolted last night, out the window flung,
minute second chances sprung forward headlong.
The glasscutter call of a chickadee breaks,
while I gulp coffee and serious list-make.
Wow, this poem has a great rhythm to it. Thanks for sharing!
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Hey Susanne, I really love this!
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Fellow bird lover, of course!
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Of course!
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I wish I had taken courses in poetry when in college–I know so little and, so, have so much trouble with real appreciation. I’m glad it came out, in the comments, that this was a villanelle, so I could look that up and then go back and re-read with the info in mind–it changed so much about the way I read and understood. Great work!
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I really and truly try hard not to write poetry that is impenetrable. I hoped the rhyme would at least make it bouncy and fun to read. I don’t think people should need a special degree to read and enjoy poetry! I thank you so much for taking the time and making the effort. That’s fabulous!
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I want to assure you it wasn’t impenetrable at all! And the structure and rhyme made me think of the chickadee’s call–it really worked! I just think more training would allow me to get even more from your hard work!
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I so enjoyed this. The check check check and the serious list-make …. really a lovely poem and clever too
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Inspired by reality. Up early yesterday, dawn hardly visible but that chickadee had a lot to say about getting started, getting going and going and going!
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I imagine this must be onomatopoeic. Nicely done
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Are there chickadees in the UK? They make a lovely, repetitive call that mimics their name.
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I don’t think so
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What an excellent thing to read first thing when even the birds are still asleep.
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What’s the first bird call you hear in the morning?
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Hmmm, sometimes it’s Mary, otherwise it’s Frida. You have confused me with bird people. 😀 😀 I wouldn’t know a brand if it lands on my head. I can only give them names… 😉 (By the way, you do check your mail, yes?)
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Where we live in Sydney, we are very lucky to hear all the natives. The laughing Kookaburra, the sulphur crested cockatoo, the Rainbow Lorikeet, the Magpie. the Raven, the Koel, and sometimes the Owl. And in a little reserve not far from the house, there are birds and calls that I can’t identify!
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I want to come to Australia and hear and see those birds! Lucky, lucky you!
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Well done – love the use of repetition, the chickadee and the serious list making.
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Thank you, my poetic friend!
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You are very welcome. You inspire me to do better.
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Awww. That’s so nice to hear. Thank you for that.
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The others in my writing group will be so impressed when I casually mention something about a villanelle. But what can you expect from a prose writer?
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Glad to supply gloating glory!
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I love, love, love this one Susanne!! ❤
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I thought of Cynthia as I wrote, trying to squeeze what I wanted to say into a villanelle. Of course the quality is nothing like her work but I now appreciate the challenge of bending an idea into a tight form.
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Well, there we go! Because I too thought of Cynthia and thought that her response would be similar to mine – we often discussed the fact that her priority was the form and mine the words (the form being quite beyond me!) and purity was found when the two met…….. I’m no expert like she was, but I did think she would be pleased by this.
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This is a poem that will make Cynthia proud. Just wonderful Susanne. Bird and coffee and lists…..yes, we each have our work cut out for us eh! I have read and re read this poem…..
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I can think of no higher compliment than someone re-reading a poem. My goodness. Thank you, Shubha.
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Oh I do love this, and especially the photo. Black capped chickadees are my favorite.
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I of course snagged that picture from the world wide web but one day I’d love to have a camera – and the time – to photograph birds. I love chickadees, too, and round here there are a few hiking trails where, if you bring seed, the little fellas will land on your fingers and feed from your palm. Ahhh-mazing.
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Ooh! Sounds it!
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It took me a few reads before I clued into the unusual style. I love the poem within the poem. Nicely done!
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The form is called a “villanelle” which I thought kind of suited the repetitious call of the chickadee. You really are an awesome reader to stick with it and read several times! Thanks for that, Joanne. Dylan Thomas’ famous poem “Do not go gentle into that good night” is a villanelle.
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Of course I had to look it up and read it in its entirety. That’s so cool. I learned something new today – and it’s poetry related!!
I’m glad I stuck with it. I got the impression that there was more to it than I was getting … and I was right 🙂🙂🙂
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Wow, Joanne likes a poem! 😮 That says it all. 😉
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I know!! Me! Hell is starting to freeze over 🙂
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